2000 Football Pool Frequently Asked Questions...
Last week I sent many of you an invitation to join this year's Suicide Football Pool. Since then, some questions have arisen regarding the email, the rules, the cost, etc. In case some of you have similar questions, I wanted to address them here. These are the frequently asked questions...
What is this?
It's an invitation to join the 2000 Suicide Football Pool.
What do I have to do?
Pick one winner every week.
That's it?
Yes.
Sounds simple.
Yes.
Can I pick St. Louis every week?
No. In fact, you can only pick St. Louis ONCE during the season.
Can I pick Tennessee every week?
No. You have to--
Can I pick Jacksonville every week?
No. Listen. You have to pick a different team every week. No repeat picks are allowed.
EVERY week?
Yes.
Are there enough teams?
There are more than enough teams.
What if I pick a team that loses by mistake?
Are you saying that you picked them by mistake? or that they lost by mistake?
Let's say a little bit of both. Am I out of the pool?
No. You can pick two losing teams and still remain in the pool. THREE losses eliminates you.
This sounds familiar. Didn't you do this last year?
Yes.
How've you been?
Fine. Thanks.
How did it go last year?
Good. We had 140 contestants. 7 made it to the playoffs. 3 made it through the Superbowl and split the pot.
There's a pot?
Yes.
How much?
The size of the pot will be determined by the number of participants.
And there were 140 people playing last year?
Yes.
What is the pool sitting at as of today?
There are 40 people so far.
Where is everybody?
Many people have yet to send in their money. Last year we had 60 people paid up at this time on the way to the record-setting 140. So 40 people now would suggest about 100 players.
How much is it to play?
$10
Hold on. 100 people at $10 each? That's like a hundred dollars.
Actually, it's more like a thousand dollars.
That's a lot of money.
True.
I mean, that's a whole lot of money.
Is there a question in here somewhere?
Is it $10 every week?
No, it's a one-time payment at the beginning of the season.
Is there still room in the pool?
Of course, there's plenty of room.
Do I have to pass some sort of test to participate?
No. You only need to have $10, some sort of access to email, and the desire to make a lot of money.
Is it hot in here?
It's a little warm.
Can I invite other people to play?
The pool is open to all friends and family. But please be selective in your inviting. You should NOT send out a blanket email to everyone in your address book.
Will you take payments via paypal?
What is paypal?
It's a way to send people money via email.
Sounds interesting, but no, I am not set up for paypal this year. Maybe next year.
Where do I send the money?
Send it to John Ducey, PO Box 1411, Studio City, CA 91614-0411.
What's the deadline for the money?
Your check must be in an envelope postmarked NO LATER THAN SEPTEMBER 2, 2000.
That's this Saturday, right?
Right.
Who do I make the check out to?
John Ducey
Are there side wagers?
That's up to you.
What's the "website" you keep referring to?
The stats for the Football Pool will be posted at www.ducey.com/pool2000.
Will the picks for everyone be displayed on the website?
Yes. You can keep track of your own progress and everyone else's. Your proposed "side wagers" can be verified quite easily.
Let's say I've sent my check. Can I pick now?
Yes.
What is our deadline for picks?
Saturday at dawn.
And what games can I pick from?
Choose a winner in any Sunday game or the Monday Night Football game.
Are there games on other days?
Yes. Sometimes there are games on Thursday and/or Saturday.
Can I choose from these games?
No.
What if my favorite team is playing on Thursday?
You still cannot pick them.
That doesn't seem fair.
Actually, it is surprisingly fair.
How far in advance can I pick?
You can pick the whole season tomorrow if you want. If you will be away from a computer for an entire week (though I don't know where that could possibly be) you may send in an extra week's pick or two. The only picking restriction is that the current week's pick is in by the time the sun rises on Saturday morning.
Why Saturday instead of Sunday?
It's easier for me.
Doesn't that seem kind of selfish?
A little, maybe, but it's a lot of work.
Oh, poor baby. He's got a lot of work to do. Boo hoo.
Well, now you're being a jerk.
Sorry.
It's OK.
How do I let you know my pick?
You send me an email with your pick to pool2000@ducey.com
How do I know you received my pick?
I will send you a quick reply email with "got it" in the subject line and your original email as the text.
What about the website?
You should also check the website to make sure I posted your pick correctly. You cannot make or change your picks on the website, though. It is just results.
Do you post them as you get them?
Yes. For the first half of the season, I will post the picks as they come in. You can change them, though, if you want, up until Saturday at dawn.
And then?
Then for the second half of the season, I will post all of them together on Saturday so that no one can see what other people are picking.
Would that be cheating?
It would resemble cheating.
Let me go back to this "pick each team only once" thing.
OK.
What if I make it to the playoffs and I have already picked every team that makes it?
Each contestant starts with a fresh slate for the playoffs.
Which people go to the playoffs?
Any contestant who has not been eliminated yet.
What if more than one person goes all the way?
As happened last year, the pot can be split amongst any number of winners.
Is there no tie-breaker?
There is one tie-breaker. Number of losses is important. Of any people who survive the whole season, only those with the fewest number of losses will split the pot. If two people make it through the whole season, including the Superbowl, and one of them has one loss while the other has two losses, then the person with one would be the sole winner.
How many losses did the winners have last year?
All three of them had sustained two losses.
Who were they?
They were Vince Cook, Kevin Mollen, and Nicole Sullivan.
Isn't she on MAD-TV?
Yes.
She does that mean Vancome Lady, right? And the dumb girl, Antonia, right?
Yes, that's right.
Where does she get off winning the pool when other people probably need the money more than she does?
She picked winning football teams better than 137 other people.
It still doesn't seem fair.
Fair's a big thing with you, isn't it?
Whatever.
Oh, now you're upset?
No, I just don't feel like talking about the football pool any more.
Fine.
Fine.
Are you mad at me?
Why do you always have to make it look like I'm the stupid one?
I don't do it on purpose.
Do you think I'm the stupid one?
I think you're very smart. In your own way.
I'm not stupid, you know.
I know.
Do you want to get a drink later?
That would be great.
Good luck in the football pool.
You too.
Later.
Ciao.
Ciao? Now THAT'S stupid.
What?
Nothing. See you tonight.
Bye.
ducey